If you’ve recently found yourself coming into the role of caring for someone with a mental health disorder or you’re just looking to rustle up some new ideas on how to help, welcome! Before we continue,

take a big, deep breath.

Some days, caring for someone with mental health disorders can feel like tending to a garden in unpredictable weather. You want to help and watch things grow, but the storms come and go without warning. It’s hard work and its okay to admit that. Caregiving can be full of love and exhaustion, patience, and heartbreak, all at once.

You don’t have to fix anyone. You’re presence, your quiet consistency, and your willingness to listen are all very valuable and powerful gifts. Sometimes, its as simple as joining them in silence while just allowing them to be. Here are a few reminders to help you along the way.

• Keep your communication simple and kind. You don’t need answers just a steady voice and an open heart and mind. Sometimes firm but fair is required but always from a place of love not frustration or anger.
• Patience is a must. There is no cure, only treatment. If you go in expecting a cure all you may find yourself unfulfilled.
• Learn the things that comfort them, but don’t take responsibility for their emotions. You are part of their support not their entire foundation.
• Give yourself permission to step away when you need to rest. Resting and recharging is necessary and not selfish. Your own mental health matters.
• Keep watch for signs that extra help may be needed. Reach out for the proper professional guidance when needed. We can’t take everything on alone sometimes, and that’s okay.
• Find community. I cannot stress enough that having a support system for yourself matters. In order to help fill the cup of others we must maintain our own as well. Finding a small group of other who understand the weight you’re carrying can help tremendously.
• Encourage them to push into their treatment plans. Taking therapy seriously, consistently taking their medications and tracking their patterns to better manage symptoms. If allowed be involved in their plan as well.
• Don’t expect “normal” for them this is as close to “normal” as it gets.
• Caregiving is a journey, not a race. Enjoy the good days and pull through the rough days.
• Don’t take things personally. Emotions can get high and tense. They may say or do things they don’t mean. While accountability needs to be taken a bit of grace is helpful.

Remember, while all of these are great pointers for some but there is no one size fits all here. Everyone handles things differently. These are just idea’s straight from myself and my emotional support husband himself. He’s stuck by me as my best friend long before we were married and this little list is made up of the things we could think of that have helped along the way. We are not professionals, just two people willing to keep up the good fight and hopefully help others along the way.

You only fail when you give up.

Remember to be kind to yourself today.~ <3 Sami